Keeping the girls united...

Wednesday, June 28, 2006

The Crown Heights Factory

Recently, I was waiting outside 770 for a chuppah - and while I was standing there, with the backdrop of the grand trees of Eastern Parkway, I experienced the consecutive Chuppahs that take place on a nightly basis in Crown Heights. It dawned on me that Crown Heights has become a factory for marriage.
It all starts at the input stage. Young single girls and boys are inputted into this "machine". There is the occassional faulty item, whereupon the machine starts flashing "reject" and the item is ejected. Statistics show that most faulty items come from abroad and tend to be free thinking.
Following the input stage, the single girls and boys are processed. This is where the dating process takes place. Over a couple of months, the machine parts are tossed around, different combinations attempted, till 2 pieces may fit together. If a faulty item managed to get through the input stage by some stroke of luck, at this point, it becomes clear that there is no way the faulty item can be processed within this factory.
Finally we have the output stage. The machine now spews out happy couples ready to settle down in Crown Heights. The marriage ceremonies are consecutive. The weddings are identical. The Crown Heights factory is now deemed efficient and effective.


At 8:49 AM, Blogger hotpantsreturns said...

now lets replace the word faulty with "too hot" and i'd have to agree heartily.

At 12:45 PM, Blogger MimJap said...

oiy its terribly true.

At 4:26 PM, Blogger AladiN said...

you make it sound so easy.....ahhh i guess this "machine" doesnt work for everyone?

At 5:35 AM, Blogger Duby said...


Far from it. Hotpants is more on track. The machine simply fails if those going into it aren't cookie cutter types. It doesn't mean inferior; quite on the contrary. Being rejected by this machine is a compliment--it means that you actually have a life!!

At 5:07 PM, Blogger DinIS81 said...

Well said!!

At 5:07 PM, Blogger DinIS81 said...

Well said!!


Post a Comment

<< Home