Where in the world is Jude?

It's been a while since this sight has been updated.
The only question on all of our minds is Where is Jude?

Jude, if your reading this -We miss you and want you back!

Shana Tova

I want to wish all our members and readers a Shana Tova, a gut gebentch yor, may this year be blessed with only mazel, happiness, health, success - everyone should get what they need both begashmiyus and beruchniyus.
At this juncture, I should also ask for mechilah from anyone who feels they have been exposed and exploited on this blog.
Ksiva Vechasima Tova
your faithful administrator,
Jude

Koppy's Lchaim

who the hell is aladdin anyway?

...i am intrigued by this character who keeps inviting the bachelorettes out for drinks...

any ideas as to the identity of this enthusiastic commentator on our blog?

Another Exciting Day at the Office

**I hope against hope that this letter will gain me the notoriety I need to finally be publicly recognized by MTV and perhaps asked to participate in Room Raiders: The Washington Heights Edition

A Questionnaire

We at "Punk'd" like to provide a questionnaire to potential recruits that helps us to better analyze their funny and overall versatility. Please take your time with the following questions as they allow us to understand your self-worth and general purpose of existence:

1) What is your favorite color?
2) If you were a bagel what flavor would you be. And why?
3) Really?
4) Lets say you fell asleep on a beach in a more ethnic (read: p.c. for the first stop made by illegal aliens before they hit pay dirt in the drug distribution business*) section of town and find yourself rudely awakened at four am by the sound of heavy panting. Upon opening your eyes you discover that you have been surrounded by a pack of rabid and potentially life-threatening dogs. Would you:
a) Run like a little girl
b) Attempt to distract the frenzied pack by barking back and peeing uncontrollably
c) You are blind and suspect that the heavy panting is in fact your boy/girlfriend. Another happy ending.
5) Please insert your own question here so we can use it on future questionnaires thus eliminating all actual work from our job description

Sincerely,

Ashton

* Racial slur intended

4 Signs that You might bored with your job as I am:

1) Planning the days's lunch menu is an arduous task that begins during your 3rd morning coffee and ends somewhere around 4pm. Middle Eastern Time.
2) The gmail screen has become more addictive than crack cocaine -- every time you it the refresh button is like taking a hit. (If you do not currently have a gmail account, please stop reading as i have no need of your friendship or approval.)
3) Getting a new email is more exciting than the first twenty four hours after buying a new puppy/baby/bar of chocolate on a whim. This of course excludes any emails from your mother and/or people who use the term "lol" in any context. Unless it is me who has inadvertently used the afore-mentioned term in which case there was probably a good reason and id prefer not to be judged.
4) Email me dammit.

crank it up

On Sunday August 6th, Captain Voee headed a mission on the loveboat to cross the Atlantic Ocean. She had by her side 3 faithful sailors. The four seafarers hit the wild waters of the atlantic ocean at approximately 2pm with merely fishing gear and lifejackets to aid them on this mission. The waters were treacherous. The loveboat faced the constant danger of being capsized by other ships in the near seas. But under the expert guidance of Captain Voee and her infamous motivation tactics such as "crank it up", the sailors perservered. As they hit shore (around 60 minutes later), physically fatigued and crispened up by the severe sun, there was a joint sigh of relief. Another arduous day at sea...

New Contributer

Hey guys, just wanted to send a shout out to the gals who have made this site such a huge success. im a huuuge fan. lol

MAZEL TOV R'CHAMA

Mazel tov R'chama on her engagmet to Zalmy Glassner from Montreal...we would like to wish the young couple much happiness and blessings...may we continue to share in many more simchas....

Regards from Down Under

Gday,
Well it's been a pretty intense and surreal week for me here in Australia - I spent a week in Sydney - which was strangely both emotional and sad, yet very nice to be together with my family. Now I'm in Melbourne for Shabbos and a couple of days - can't be in Melbourne without hitting the shops.
And then Wednesday, its back to the stinkin hot weather in NY. I just got over my jetlag here and acclaimated myself to the winter, and time to readjust all over again. sigh.
So to those bachelorettes in NY, I will be seeing you shortly. Meanwhile there is a small contingent of us here in Australia creating waves of chaos.
Thats all for now
Your trusty administrator
Jude